CHALLENGE: Why is real connection so important to your life?
REALity: Have you ever been jealous of the connections that other people have? I remember our first year at a new school that 2 of my children were attending. Even though we weren’t the only new family that year, it felt like everyone knew each other so well. Most of the families lived in another part of town than us, so they all had a connection to each other besides the school. There was no public transportation, so all the moms formed a line in the school pick up line. However, moms didn’t stay in their vehicles; they got out and mingled with each other until dismissal. I remember being so jealous of their connections.
I would watch them talking to each other, laughing, and enjoying each other’s company. Every afternoon my feelings of disconnection grew, and I also sulked in my car having a pity party. Why didn’t anyone come to talk to me; was I not likable enough; why didn’t any other mom want to connect with me? It was like being the new girl sitting alone in the school cafeteria because no one wants to sit with you.
Yes, in a perfect world all ‘new kids’ would be welcomed with open arms and made to feel like part of the group. Over the years, I have realized that a lot of people are either oblivious to the feelings of others and/or they don’t have the skills to know how to include others. It is up to you to take the first step - no matter how scary and intimidating it is!
After months of pity parties, I finally realized that if I wanted to get to know the moms better and make some connections then I had to be the one to start connecting. So, one day, I said a prayer for courage, and I got out of my car. I walked over to other moms and joined in. That one simple act of courage changed the trajectory of the rest of our time at that school.
INSPIRATION: Real Connection can add so much value to our lives if we open ourselves up to it. When we find those people who we really connect with, a new relationship starts to blossom like a spring flower. A seed is planted, grows slowly and consistently and then is nourished to become a beautiful addition to our lives. Flowers don’t flourish in one day and neither do connections. That is what makes them both so wonderful.
The real connection takes time to be planted in order to grow and flourish, but when it blossoms the beauty added to our lives is substantial.
By getting out of my car in the dismissal line, I created a real connection to another mom that remains to this day. The connection grew slowly but I made the time to nurture it with small baby steps. The connection to this other mom has grown into such a meaningful relationship that I cherish. Her realness and honesty always inspire me to be the same. THE WORD OF TRUTH: The reason real connection is so important is that God created His daughters to be relational and connected. He wants us to fellowship with each other, encourage each other, help each other and hold each other accountable. He wants us to live life together and not separate. No matter your personality type, connection matters and is beneficial.
In the book of Ruth, we learn about two women brought together by hard circumstances. Ruth was married to Naomi’s son. First Naomi’s husband dies then several years later both of her sons die. After the deaths, Naomi urged both of her daughters-in-law to return to their mothers and original home. One daughter-in-law left but Ruth resolved to remain with Naomi.
Ruth knew that staying connected with her mother-in-law was her purpose. Ruth tells Naomi, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go, I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.” (Ruth 1:16)
Through Ruth’s faithfulness and connection to Naomi, she would later find romantic love again and become a mother in the line of Jesus’ heritage. God used both Ruth and Naomi to strengthen each other in difficult times as well as celebrate each other in times of God’s tremendous blessings. A beautiful story to see how much God encourages his daughters to be relational.
Realize the importance of real connections for a more fulfilling and satisfying life.
Get out of your car and take a baby step; you never know what will flourish.
Trust God as you rely on His wisdom to understand the importance of real connection with Him and others.
Read the follow up blog posts on making real connections.
For more connection, download our Free Resource: The Real Connection Starter Guide.